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Day of the whatsit

Today I've been feeling kind of down hearted and annoyed at everything. So today's Doctor Who should have cheered me up, shouldn't it? Shouldn't it?

This is supposed to be Doctor Who. It is NOT The Steven Moffat Show. At least RTD seemed to like Doctor Who as a show - though he had his own ideas about its direction, of course. But... Moffat seems to want to make it into The Steven Moffat Show! Where he can give weekly blowjobs to himself.

All in all, Day of the Moon was kind of mediocre. Not much action, a lot of 'running gags' and plot points that made no sense or were deliberate obfuscation. Also, is it now a crime to show events in order? I don't know if this was Moffat's writing or the direction or what but... The unnecessary drive to the Orphanage followed by the immediate flash back to the TARDIS was jarring and... well... unnecessary. That's a minor complaint though.
Let's count the Moffat tropes, shall we?
Perfect Prison
Mystery person
Timey-wimey stuff
Writing on wall
Creepy children
Unresolved plot threads
ANOTHER mystery person
Forced intrigue

The list goes on. Especially the forced intrigue, that's got its own subcategory and pie chart!

Visually, the episode was very impressive. The shots of Utah and elsewhere were amazing! That prison was freaky cool as well. (Where did 1969 America get hold of all that high tech alien equipment and know how to use it and yet not know how to use a camera phone?). The rest was a bit gloomy, but I guess that fits in with the mood they were trying to set.
Mostly, the acting was good. Matt was doing the best he could with what he was given, as were the other characters. But I feel, more than with RTD, Moffat's own characters are being given more attention than the doctor himself who seems to be pushed to a side line, goofy character who wears silly hats.

Random thought... Whatever happened to staying relative to things within the causal nexus?

The Silence, or Jimmy Big Hands, were pretty menacing, I have to say. Even though the suits are hilarious. But... What did they... DO exactly? What have they done that warrants them being mown down in a slaughter? Moreover, isn't River Song EXACTLY the sort of person the Doctor should hate? Seriously. Whatever happened to "No. No annihilating. Not while I'm around. I'm the Doctor, the oncoming storm, do you understand me?"
Which reminds me, that's another Moffat trope! Villains with no motivation! Prisoner Zero - what did he/she do? The Weeping Angels - what's their angle? Really? They're just EVIL? Oh. Right. That's plausible.

Anyway, then there's that random regeneration at the end. Again, intrigue for the sake of intrigue. We've already got a "OOH WHO IS THIS PERSON?" in the form of River Song (and The Doctor... This is Doctor WHO after all). All the same, I'm putting my guess as... The child is Amelia. *shrug* Why not? Not much else makes sense in a Moffat script, why should this?

In my frustration, I wrote what I feel is a fair and balanced parody of a Moffat Script.


MYSTERY MAN: Hullo everybody! I might be the Doctor's dad! But I might not be! Oooh! You'll certainly not find out until the finale! Bye!

RORY: Um... What was all that about?

THE DOCTOR: Bonky wonky doodly doo!

AMY: Oh, Doctor, you're so crazy and your one liners are so well placed it's as if someone is writing them for you. Sexual inuendo. Look how short my skirt is!

RORY: Stop that, Amy! Look! It's the Doctor again! This time it's the FUTURE Doctor!


FUTURE DOCTOR: Bonky wonky DARK doom! Criptic and spooky clue that I will never elaborate on for implausible reasons. BONKY WONKY BYE!


AMY: But Doctor, how can there be two of you? AGAIN?

THE DOCTOR: Well it's quite simple... blonky wonky doodly doop.

RORY: Come on, Amy, this has already happened fifteen times in the last half an hour.

AMY: But I'm supposed to represent the ignorant audience who don't get this obviously brilliant plot twist!

RORY: But Amy... I love you!

THE DOCTOR: Stop that you two! We have to go bony wonky somewhere else for a while. Hold my fez.

AMY: But Doctor! I've fogotten everything! It's very mysterious how I suddenly forgot how to see, isn't it?

THE DOCTOR: That's not possible!

RORY: Look out, Doctor! That mystery man is back! And he wants to put you in the perfect prison!

AMY: You'll never get out of this one, Doctor. You always save the day, though, don't you?

MYSTERY MAN: Aha! Doctor! Your end is nigh and my motives and intentions will never be revealed!

THE DOCTOR: I may not know how to defeat you, but I know someone who does!


MYSTERY MAN: Curses! You have foiled me this time, Doctor! But I will return, if you'll let me leave.

THE DOCTOR: Sounds reasonable to me.

AMY: Who are you, mystery man?

MYSTERY MAN: I'm certainly not the Doctor's father... OR AM I?


RORY: Care to explain, Doctor?

THE DOCTOR: It's all very symple... Bonky wonky doodle bom.



Right. I need to calm down, now. It's not good for me.

In other news...

Work trial at the Dicconson Arms has been set for THIS Monday! Eeek! Will update if it changes AGAIN, but hopefully I'll get it. If I am given the job there will be much rejoicing! The money will hopefully pay off my overdraft and give me some spending cash for Finland times! Woo! So, wish me luck, you guys!


( 8 comments — Leave a comment )
Apr. 30th, 2011 10:53 pm (UTC)
The lack of linear events really confuses me. I have a tiny brain and can't keep up. :(

That script is the truth. Particularly FIFTEEN HATS AT ONCE.

Hope you feel better soon. And good luck with The (Potential) Job.
Apr. 30th, 2011 11:00 pm (UTC)
They're designed to be confusing, I think. That whole wibbly wobbly timey wimey line is there to get out of obvious contradictions. XD

I note that fifteen appears to be my favourite number. It's the one I usually go for when picking at random. XD

I think I've got my frustration out of my system now. ;) Wasn't a good start with the royal farce going on the previous day either! D:
Learning how to pull a pint! And pour wine! And hurl champagne at people! That'll be interesting! You know about alcohol, don't you? Well, more than me... What's it for? Where does it come from? WHAT POWERS DOES IT BESTOW!? :o
Apr. 30th, 2011 11:05 pm (UTC)
My sister started a bar job a month or so ago. Apparently pulling pints is a bit difficult at first (either you end up with a pint with no head or ALL HEAD). She tells me silly stories about the random stuff customers ask for.

Alcohol can taste nice! But often not. And it can be good and happy-making but then you drink too much and end up telling people about Harry Potter fanfic. :(
Apr. 30th, 2011 11:11 pm (UTC)
Odd. Matt told me it was super easy. Oh god! D: Maybe Yorkshire beer is different to Lancashire beer?
I've had my fair share of random stories from the cafe where people are SOBER. Krishna help me with none sober people. XD

"And there was this one time that I read about Voldemort having sex with Nagini. That was hot. No, wait! COME BACK!"

Oh! You've seen the new trailer, I suppose? Looks like they've extended the post-Kings-Cross-Of-Death stuff.
Apr. 30th, 2011 11:14 pm (UTC)
But at least the pub isn't in Parbold, is it? Maybe the strangeness is confined...

It was at Scholar's Dinner and I started telling a girl I'd never met before about The Worst Fanfic Ever, You Know, That One. XD She still talked to me afterwards, amazingly!

Yes! I am so scared for the King's Cross scene, it was bad enough in the book. D: Creepy mutilated baby Voldemort!
Apr. 30th, 2011 11:19 pm (UTC)
It's ONLY JUST outside of Parbold. XD
I was worried when one of the villagers told me that the place "Has very respectable people" who go regularly. Oh dear.

The brain one or the American wizard one? Either way... yeah...
She tried to keep you talking while she called the authorities. :p

Yes! I get the feeling that will be downplayed, though. The Dumbledore-Grindlewald thing was very minimal in Part 1, wasn't it? Also, sitting down and explaining things doesn't make good cinema. :\
But that Harry pulls Voldemort OFF A CLIFF thing looks so... WHAT?!?
Apr. 30th, 2011 11:24 pm (UTC)
I hope they wear morning suits!

The brain one. THE BRAIN ONE. :(

But it's one of the best scenes! (Despite the fear.) That plus Harry walking through the wood to his death. If they mess that up I will be sad.

Oh, I'm glad I'm not the only one who wtfed at that. I kept thinking 'was this in the book and I missed it...?' Here's hoping it's a dream or something.
Apr. 30th, 2011 11:29 pm (UTC)
Voldemort doing an impression of a Silent...
I was personally hoping for them to be dressed as the village people. XD

Oh god. OH GOD! Why did you tell ME about that one? D:

It is, in the book! Because books are different from films. I love REVELATION TIEMS, but I know people who go to watch movies don't like the sitting down and having a nice little chat while all the plans are explained. :(
The thing with The Forest Again is that so much of the power comes from Harry's internal agony. Something that you really can't do on-screen very well. :(
Looks like we're getting Snape's story, though... That'll take up about half an hour!

Voldemort can fly. Whose to say Harry doesn't grab a random broom or something. Also, if Hogwarts is all destroyed, does that mean there was no filming in Oxford for this one? ;_;
( 8 comments — Leave a comment )


J.K. Cornah

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